Here Comes Honey Boo Boo...

I know I am a little behind the times on this show, however to say that I don't know where to begin is such an understatement! I guess I will start with their names, Mama June, Sugar Bear, Pumpkin, Chubbs, Chikadee & of course Honey Boo Boo. 

Holy hell! I don't think a show has ever caused me greater emotional conflict. I find myself disgusted, laughing to the point of tears, literally unable to grasp that people live this way and yet strangely attracted to the endearing love they obviously have for one another all at the same time. To top it all off I cannot understand a word these people say, and obviously TLC knew this would be an issue as well as they have wisely added subtitles. 

:: Lessons from Honey Boo Boo ::

::Vocabulary::

This old barn - Your face

S'mage - a facial or massage

Forklift Foot - "When you get your foot run over by a forklift and you get your toes all mangled, I guess?"

The BamBam Look - Apparently an outfit worn without shoes

Biscuit - A vajay jay

Shack 'em up dates - The relationship Mama June and Sugar Bear have had for 8 years

Guess Who's Breath - A family game where one member is blindfolded and the remaining family members take turns blowing their breath into the blindfolded persons face to match the breath to the person. * I simply do not have words, I am at a loss for them and cannot believe what I am currently witnessing.

Ew - poop

A Dear Call - When someone hits a deer with their car and the family then goes and collects the remains for food.

Sassified - How Honey Boo Boo feels when she is in her pageant dress

Bingo Face - What occurs when Mama June squints in an attempt to see the numbers called for Bingo

Uncle Poodle - A gay man who help Alana with the finer points of pageants who may or may not be her uncle? TBD

Smexy - A man considered to be sexually desirable when dressed in a Santa Claus costume

:: Words of Wisdom ::

"Alana thinks Elvis is an elf!" Not going to lie I just spit out my granola bar as I heard and watched Mama June utter these words...

"When June sat on my lap she didn't really ask for nothing but I couldn't feel my feet!"

"The girls did my makeup to begin with, I looked like a damn rodeo clown!"

"Ill be honest I don't brush my teeth except for special occasions"

"Kaylin's coming out of Anna's biscuit" Honey Boo Boo describing what will happen when her sister has her baby.

"We have a connection to deer cause we like roadkill, we like to kill it, clean it, grind it and freeze it up...June didn't like the deer but I actually like the deer...I gotta figure out a name for him." This was made in response to the gift of a bronzed deer Sugar Bear gave to Mama June

"June used a fork this time, I guess to try and be a little more romantic - but it didn't work!" 

"Anna starting having contractions and that's when you start to pull your baby out with your biscuit" Honey Boo Boo describing childbirth

" Mama I'm gonna look like a steetwalkin..." Honey Boo Boo to Mama June

"Mama better stick to cuponing and stay away from the makeup table." Honey Boo Boo to Mama June

"Bingo is Mama's sport." * I'm pretty sure Bingo doesn't count as a "sport'


"The table manners, I don't really enforce them." Mama June

"Alana's short and chunky and I'm short and chunky so who the hell cares it is what it is...she gets the short from me and the chunky from her Daddy." Mama June

"I love em, I hope we never take down the Christmas decorations,  for serious, when all the Christmas decorations are up it's easy to find your house." Honey Boo Boo

:: Recipes ::

Lemonade - 5lbs of sugar 2 gallons of lemon juice and MORE sugar!

Sketti - Butter, Sketti, Ketchup : "A little bit of butter with a little bit of ketchup melted in the microwave and poured over sketti."

Sugar Bear and Mama June Muddin it!

If you haven't had the opportunity to watch "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo," watch it! I've never seen anything like it and the bottom line is they may lack manners, healthy eating habits or a strong sense of personal hygiene but one things is clear they all love one another very much and at the end of the day they seem to have exceedingly warm hearts and a great deal of kindness not just for their family but for others as well. 

Cheers to "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo!" I dare you to watch it and not laugh & cry at the same time!

Love,